[32] How My Grandmother’s Angry Scowl Became A Beautiful Smile
祖母的愤怒表情如何转变为安详的笑容
(Can Those With Mental Ailments Like Dementia Reach Pure Land?)
(精神病患者如失智症病人是否能往生西方极乐世界？)
One late afternoon, there was a sudden call from Malaysia. It was from an uncle, who informed of my Grandmother’s sudden passing. (Not her picture above.) When we rushed there from Singapore, we had one of the greatest shocks of our lives… Grandmother’s eyes were glaring widely and her face was scowling with obvious great anger. The few of us who just arrived took barely one look, before turning to walk away. All were unsure of what to make of her expression and what to do. Her expression was nothing short of horrifying. To date, I have never seen such intense anger on anyone’s face before. It was so great that to take a closer look was challenging.
一天近傍晚时分，我们突然接到了一通马来西亚的长途电话。叔叔拨电通知我们祖母突然逝世了（以上非祖母照片）。我们即刻启程赶到祖母家。等待我们的是最为惊悚的一幕：祖母双目直视，表情狰狞。我们刚到埠的几人都不忍卒睹，仅仅一瞥就转头走开。我们所有人都无法理解祖母为何死不瞑目。这让在场的家人完全不知所措。她的表情极为恐怖。当时的我从未看过如此愤怒的表情，狰狞的程度让人退却三步。
Her ‘final’ expression was particularly unsettling because from my lifelong memories of Grandmother, she never raised her voice or expressed unhappiness, be it verbally or physically, at anyone or about any issue. She was the mildest, most patient and gentle human being I personally knew. My Father affirmed this, especially since he was an extremely naughty boy, yet never getting even a single spanking from her. Now that she looked so extremely displeased, all of us knew that her passing was an unhappy ‘ending’. The differences between her usual look and her present look were as great as they were disturbing.
祖母的遗容让我特别惴惴不安，因为在我记忆中的祖母对任何人事物都是轻声细语，温柔以待的。她是我所认识性格最为温顺、最有耐性且温和的人。我父亲完全同意，因为他从小就是一个极为调皮的小孩，但祖母从没体罚过他。祖母遗容如此不堪入目，我们所有人心里都明白，她没有善终。她生前死后的表情有着天壤之别，令人感到极度不安。
My Father much later explained that Grandmother had died with dementia. When she was diagnosed with it much earlier, he had volunteered to pay for her expenses, to stay in a nursing home in her Malaysian hometown. However, without communication, she was discharged by the uncle, whose family was the previous and final caregivers. She was returned home to stay with them. As my Father is a Singaporean, who did not live in the same country, the arrangement was accepted. However, the family eventually did not care well enough for Grandmother, often leaving her to her own devices.
我父亲稍后告诉我，祖母去世前就已患有失智症。当父亲早前获知祖母患病时，他主动承诺并承担祖母入住位于马国家乡疗养院的所有开销。但在缺乏沟通的情况下，和她同住的叔叔却擅自把祖母接回家中与他们一家同住。叔叔一家是祖母最初和最终的照护者。父亲因已经入籍新加坡且不在马国居住，他也唯有同意叔叔的安排。但叔叔一家最终并没好好地照顾祖母，经常让祖母自行其是。
As dementia worsens, the patient can even forget the need to, and how to handle basic survival functions, such as eating, bathing and even going to the restroom. It was said that Grandmother was once found lying on her bed on a very dirty pillow, and in her own waste, sadly symptomatic of the lack of mindful care for her. She must have died due to the last stages of dementia. But if dementia meant being confused, what explained her explicit expression of anger?
当失智症患者的病情越发严重，就会丧失如吃饭、洗澡甚至上洗手间这些基本活动的自理能力。据了解，祖母一度躺在一个极脏的枕头上，床上都是自己的排泄物，完全没有获得应有的妥善照顾。她过世必因晚期失智症所致，但是她若因患失智症而已神志不清，那她表情为何如此愤怒？
When anyone with a mental ailment linked to the brain passes away, the consciousness that used to function through the brain is disconnected. This is when such ailments, being first physical in nature, before being mental, will cease to exist. That is, dementia that is experienced through a malfunctioning brain will cease to function, rendering the consciousness free from dementia (or any other such ailments). This is when the consciousness of the newly deceased will be more wakeful, even aware of one’s manner of passing. Grandmother must have realised, with great indignation, that her last days were terrible due to lack of proper care.
当患有精神疾病的病人离世时，仰赖大脑活动的神识就会与肉体分离。这时，所有生前的身体与心神疾病都不复存在。原本因脑部患病而导致的失智症就完全终止，神识也不再受到任何精神疾病的约束。刚逝世死者的神识就会一下子变得更为清醒，甚至更能感知到自己去世的原因。祖母必定是因为感知到在世的最后日子失于妥善的照护而感到极为愤怒。
While the other family members seemed to be guilty, as they talked among themselves at a distance to arrange for funeral matters, I knew I had to do something to help Grandmother, especially if her consciousness is still around, as is often the case of the recently deceased, due to habitual attachment to the body, family and/or house. I did the only thing I knew should be done. I took out a Nianfo device (念佛机), that plays the name of ‘Amituofo’ (阿弥陀佛: Amita[bha] Buddha), placed it near Grandmother’s body, and sat by her.
在场的家人似乎都感到内疚，都在远处讨论着丧礼事宜。我意识到我必须做些什么帮一帮祖母。尤其因为刚逝世的祖母的神识可能还执着于身体、家人和/或房子而流连于附近。我只做了一件我知道必须做的事。我取出了可播放「阿弥陀佛」圣号的念佛机，放在祖母的遗体旁。我自己就坐在她身边。
As I was new to support-chanting, I did not do anything outwardly dramatic at all, while the rest of the family silently let me do what I did. I was so shy that I simply offered words of guidance firmly in my mind. Closing my eyes to better Nianfo sincerely, I thought ‘aloud’, ‘Grandma, you have already passed away. Please do not be angry at anyone any more, as it will do no one any good. It is time to let all these go. Please Nianfo with me as sincerely as you can, until you see Amituofo come to receive you to his Pure Land, where there is no more suffering, where there is only bliss.‘ This was followed by utterly sincere silent Nianfo, following the Nianfo device as a guide…
我因不熟悉助念，所以就老老实实地念佛。其他家人也都默许我当时的行为。我是一个害羞的孩子，只能在心里给予祖母简单的开示。为了能至诚念佛，我紧闭双眼的同时大声地在心里说：「阿嬷，你已经过世了。请别再气任何人了，因为这对于妳和大家都无益。妳应该放下所有的执着。请妳跟我一起念佛，越诚心越好，直到妳见到佛来接引您到祂的净土。在那里没有任何痛苦，只有安乐。」说完后，我就跟随念佛机，非常诚心地默念「阿弥陀佛」名号。
About twenty minutes later, I opened my eyes. Taking another look at Grandmother’s expression, I had the next greatest shock of my life. This time, it was a most pleasant surprise. As I am writing this, recalling what I saw years ago, tears of great rejoice and gratitude still well up fully in my eyes. While my eyes were closed, Grandmother’s eyes had closed by themselves. She now has the most peaceful and blissful smile I have ever seen on anyone’s face. It had become the total opposite of her earlier expression. Recalling her days alive, even though she was always a kindly smiling old lady, she had never looked so peaceful and blissful before. This is her truly final expression!
当我睁开眼睛时，时间已经过了约20分钟。当我再次看了一下祖母的遗容时就吓了一跳。这一看也是最为意外的惊喜。当我写下这一段尘封已久的记忆时，我都会喜极而泣，心里充满感激之情。当我闭上眼睛时，祖母的双目自行闭上了。她现在脸上挂着的笑容是我见到最为安乐的。这与她先前的遗容千差万别。我记得她在世时虽是一位和蔼可亲、笑容满面的老人家，可是我从来都没有见过她如此地安详和欢喜。这才是她真正的遗容！
My heart that felt so unbearably heavy before immediately lightened with joy and gladness. I immediately knew deep down that Grandmother is now alright. She must had followed the advice to Nianfo sincerely, and happily connected to Amituofo, who came to receive her to his Pure Land. There was no other way to explain the drastic transformation within such a short period. It was then that a group of volunteer Buddhists arrived, preparing to offer more support-chanting. It was from this experience that I learnt about the utmost importance of sincerity when doing support-chanting, even if one is not a great practitioner, even if the deceased (or dying) is probably not so too. As the consciousness of the deceased can read our minds, our genuine concern can be truly felt, with our advice truly heeded upon knowing we really care and wish to help. Often, there is no need for elaborate external rituals at all.
我原本沉重的心顿时豁然开朗轻安，心里一下子感到喜悦和欢喜。我当下感受到祖母现在已经安然无恙。她应该听从了我的开示后诚心念佛，而且感应了阿弥陀佛的接引，并且已随祂往生西方极乐世界了。这是唯一能解释她的遗容能在那么短的时间内由怒转喜的原因。这时一群佛教志愿助念团已经到达，准备继续助念。诚然助念者虽不是道行高的念佛人，而死者（或临终的人）亦不是，但这次的亲身经历让我认识到诚心助念的重要性。因死者的神识有他心通，我们真切的关心和开示、真心诚意给予一臂之力的念头，他们都会一一感受到的。在很多时候，其他铺张的仪式都是不必要的。
Yes – those with mental ailments can be helped with Nianfo to reach Amituofo’s Pure Land too. Despite difficulties, they should be guided to Nianfo sincerely every day when alive, especially by practising with them. Even if not done with great concentration, the point is to nurture this pure habit, to familarise with Amituofo, to prepare for the final moments later. If difficult to chant aloud and in sync, encourage chanting mentally or listening intently. When the consciousness disconnects from the body upon death, the consciousness free from the ailment will be able to Nianfo much easier. This is why support-chanting is ideally present from before to after death, to guide with sincere Nianfo, to swiftly connect to Amituofo, before karma forces rebirth to elsewhere.
患有精神相关疾病的病人确实也能念佛往生西方的。照护这样的病人虽然困难重重，但当他们在世时每日的开示劝勉他们念佛，并且与他们一起念佛都是必做的。虽然未能很专注念佛，最为重要的是培养念佛的习惯，熟悉阿弥陀佛，为临终做最完善的准备。若难以出声念佛或无法跟上念佛的节奏，我们应该鼓励他们在心里默念或用至诚心聆听佛号。当死亡来临时，神识和肉体分离了，无疾病缠身的神识就更容易念佛。因此，在病人临终时乃至死后，都应当进行助念。在个人业力尚未现前牵引投生他方时，就为他们开示鼓励他们至诚念佛，力求在最短的时间内与佛相应，就能随佛往生西方极乐世界。
Also, with or without mental ailments, if one is heavily drugged, the bad news is that before physical death, as the consciousness still functions through the body, one will experience drowsy effects of such medication. This can thus affects the quality of Nianfo. As such, they should be administered only when needed, and as little as possible. The good news is that when deceased, when the consciousness disconnects or departs from the body, even if still abiding in the body, the consciousness will no longer experience the earlier drowsiness through the body. It is therefore a great misunderstanding, that all who die with mental ailments or drugged cannot Nianfo to reach Pure Land. When they do reach Pure Land, they will be forever free from otherwise possibly ripening remnant negative karma, that might bear fruits as mental and physical ailments. There will only be ultimate spiritual and physical bliss!
有无精神方面的疾病都好，病人若因服用药物后而昏昏沉沉，在临死前仰赖脑部的神识也会迷迷糊糊。这样的情况会大大地影响念佛的质量。因此，非到万不得已，千万不可妄加使用这些药物，或尽可能少剂量使用。死亡后，当神识脱离了肉体，或还附在遗体时，神识不会再有昏沉的感觉。大家经常认为因精神相关疾病而逝世的病人是无法念佛往生西方的，这一说法是一大误会。当他们往生西方极乐世界后，所有残余的恶业力已无法再起任何作用，身心疾病也无因缘现前。这就是终极的身心极乐！
南无阿弥陀佛
Namo Amituofo : SS
译者: KC Leo
Related Article:
How To Help Those With Dementia Reach Pure Land
https://purelanders.com/2013/09/04/how-to-help-those-with-dementia-reach-pure-land
Related Course:
Understanding Amituofo Via The Amitabha Sutra
http://thedailyenlightenment.com/?s=Understanding+Amituofo+Via+The+Amitabha+Sutra+run
