[125] A Doubly-Inspiring Support-Chanting Experience Offering Important Reminders
Support-Chanting For M
I heard about support-chanting (助念) for 50-year-old M in October 2024. Having practised support-chanting for a friend’s 80+ year-old mother the year before, I readily expressed my interest to join.
On 23 Oct, after sending my son off for his sports class, I reached M’s home at 1.30 pm. A group of support-chanters had already gathered near M’s bedside. The first thing that struck me was how much M looked like the 80+ year-old lady I previously chanted for, despite there being a 30-over-year age gap between them. As I stared at M’s shallow breathing in her weakened state, I was aware that she was quickly approaching her end-of-life stage (临终相). I realised that whether young or old, once afflicted with a critical illness like cancer, our bodies are likely to slowly waste away into a common form – one with sunken cheeks and hollowed eyes.
A picture of Āmítuófó (阿弥陀佛) was mounted in front of her bed and regular guidance (开示) was given by a Dharma brother, and a Venerable (Bhikṣuṇī: Buddhist nun) present. I sat and proceeded to chant along with the group. Except for a moment when she briefly struggled and kicked away at the Dharani blanket draped over her, M was mostly calm and peaceful.
The Bhikṣuṇī got M’s family members to take turns to give guidance — specifically to encourage her to let go of her worries and to follow Āmítuófó to his Western Pure Land Of Ultimate Bliss (西方极乐世界/净土). There was an especially touching moment as M’s youngest son (who has a learning disorder) could clearly and resolutely advise his mother with the following words, ‘Mummy, you must go to Pure Land.’
After drawing in a few last breaths, M passed on peacefully at around 2.45 pm, surrounded by support-chanters. While M’s passing was very peaceful, her facial expression showed some contortions, with her mouth agape and eyes rolled back. At that moment, I wondered whether this meant that M had slipped into the bardo (中阴) (intermediate) state instead of transiting immediately from a dying stage for rebirth in Pure Land (临终前往生)…
Witnessing An Amazing Auspicious Sign
I took my leave at 3 pm to pick my son up and rejoined the group after 10 pm upon ending my work. (The support-chanting group had decided to continue support-chanting until 3 am). By then, M had her face and body fully covered by a Dharani (Rebirth) Blanket (陀罗尼被；往生被): https://purelanders.com/2023/02/25/top-ten-facts-to-know-about-the-dhara%e1%b9%87i-rebirth-blanket).
I heard from another support-chanter that numerous auspicious signs (瑞相) had been noted since M’s passing in the afternoon. M’s husband dreamt of M atop a lotus flower in the afternoon, while another support-chanter had a vision of Āmítuófó laying a lotus flower down, which grew bigger as M stepped onto it. M waved happily to the support-chanter as she bade farewell. This gave me a lot of encouragement, although I secretly wished I could witness these amazing signs personally too.
At about 12.30 am, a doctor came in to certify M’s demise. By this time, the group had practised almost ten hours of support-chanting. As the Dharani Blanket was slowly unveiled, the room was filled with quiet gasps as M’s facial features had changed completely. Her mouth was fully closed and revealed a blissful smile. Her eyes were slightly open with the pupils centred, exhibiting a gentle gaze at everyone looking at her. Her cheeks which were previously sunken and hollow were now filled and supple.
This was my first time witnessing the auspicious sign of ‘the facial appearance as if alive’ (面相如生) in person (https://purelanders.com/2023/02/07/the-auspicious-sign-of-the-facial-appearance-as-if-alive). I was filled with a sense of awe and Dharma bliss. As we continued support-chanting, I could sense a transition in my mood. From chanting Āmítuófó’s name as a form of support to the deceased (助念), it felt like I was now chanting to give praise (赞佛) to his great loving-kindness and compassion, in delivering upon his vow to liberate all sentient beings.
After sharing merits from the support-chanting, I left the group while other female support-chanters stayed back to help M to change into a set of clean clothes. Subsequent feedback they gave was that M’s body was generally soft and supple, save for some areas which were stiffer. (This is the auspicious sign, of ‘the body and mind being gentle and soft [身心柔软]: https://purelanders.com/2023/03/06/96-the-auspicious-sign-of-the-body-and-mind-being-gentle-and-soft.)
To Help Others Is To Help Oneself
An even more amazing thing happened on the morning of 25 October. While I was doing my morning chanting, my wife entered the room and asked about the Threefold Refuge Ceremony (三皈依仪式). I was surprised because she had been very cautious about embracing a new religion and would sometimes form a defensive wall when talking about Buddhism.
The change in thinking was due to a moment of epiphany the previous night, when she suddenly thought of her ageing parents‘ mortality. Hence, she saw taking refuge and chanting as a way to share merits and benefit her parents. Deep inside, I was very happy as I had always wanted her to become a practising Buddhist, specifically one who chants and aspires for rebirth in the Western Pure Land.
This once again illustrated the unfathomable power of creating merits with our Dharma practice, and with sharing of the merits with our loved ones. Through helping M, I received almost instantaneous benefits for our family members. It is no wonder that Great Master Yìnguāng (印光大师) described the Dharma Door Of Mindfulness Of Buddha (念佛法门) as a wish-fulfilling gem (如意珠)!
Another Reminder Of Impermanence
While M’s departure filled me with a lasting sense of Dharma bliss, I was shocked to learn about her husband’s (D) sudden demise on 4 December, barely 49 days since M’s passing. D had collapsed suddenly from a heart attack. As I was in China, I was unable to attend the support-chanting at D’s wake on 5 December.
Upon my return on 6 December’s evening, I was invited to join an ad-hoc support-chanting session on 7 December night. This was planned by a Dharma brother, as a last attempt to give guidance to D, as a fellow support-chanter had a vision of D sitting up from his resting place during the wake, being unwilling to depart for rebirth in Āmítuófó’s Pure Land. Due to his sudden demise, leaving three boys behind, D was perhaps unwilling to let go. Given that the cremation was due to take place on 8 December morning, the group had only a couple of hours to give guidance to D in his bardo state.
At various PPF sessions, Teacher Shi’an had emphasised the importance of support-chanting at wakes, also known as liberation during the bardo state (中阴身救度) as the chances of rebirth in Āmítuófó’s Pure Land remain high (断气后往生). Hence, I had faith that every effort counted towards helping the deceased.
Upon arrival at the spacious funeral parlour, I was glad to have the Creative iRoar speaker recommended by Teacher Shi’an to play the support-chanting track, as a normal chanting device might not be adequately audible. As we already had an experienced Dharma brother to provide guidance to D, I took intermittent breaks to stand in front of D’s portrait to offer a little guidance of my own.
In my guidance, I shared some sincere thoughts, hoping they would help D to let go. (The consciousness of the deceased is now able to read the minds of those present directly.)
(i) As a father of two boys myself, I understand how hard it is for D to let go. I have seen how his kids are handling the matter with maturity and steadfastness, which should be comforting for D.
(ii) D must have felt that M’s peaceful passing was possible because she could entrust the three boys to his care. I conveyed to D that this is not the correct way of thinking because a father would be difficult to replicate the standard of care which a mother provides. Rather, M’s successful rebirth was because she had awakened to the transient nature of everything in this Sahā World (娑婆世界). Parents die, as do their children. The best way to help our loved ones is not just by clothing and feeding them, but by guiding them out of the cycle of rebirth. Hence, instead of entrusting her kids to him, M was serving as an example for D to follow in time.
(iii) As time is running out. D must not be attached to the bardo state as rebirth can take place at any time. Within a few hours, the cremation ceremony will take place and it will be harder to let go when family members turn emotional. Like when encountering an emergency on a flight, one is supposed to put on an oxygen mask personally before helping one’s children. If D is reborn in this Sahā World, not only will he not recognise his children (and vice-versa), he may even end up merely as a meal on their dining plates, if reborn as an animal.
(iv) One day in the Western Pure Land equates to one kalpa (劫) in this Sahā World. Hence, upon reuniting with M, D may see himself surrounded by his sons right after washing his face in a lotus pond (梳洗一番). Hence, there is no need to be anxious, as there will be speedy gratification in the Pure Land.
As the group continued chanting, I saw the Dharma brother in charge rise from his seat, returning with a big smile. He whispered to me that a fellow support-chanter had a vision of D stepping onto a white lotus flower with red borders, following Guānyīn Bodhisattva (观音菩萨) to the Western Pure Land. (With mindfulness of Āmítuófó, there should be seeing of Āmítuófó, although the Bodhisattva can also accompany him. White lotus flowers are described to exist in the Pure Land too.) I felt joy emanating within as I chanted along, with the entire session ending at 3 am.
From initial joy at M’s successful rebirth, to shock at D’s passing, and subsequent relief at D’s liberation, this doubly-inspiring support-chanting experience was a poignant lesson on the truth of impermanence and helplessfulness experienced in this Sahā World (if not knowing how to be mindful of Āmítuófó). This is also a powerful reminder on the importance of letting go in time, for taking refuge in Āmítuófó’s great protective embrace completely.
南无阿弥陀佛 : 净成
Námó Āmítuófó : Jìngchéng
10 January 2025
